Poseidon (2006) – Film Review

Director: Wolfgang Petersen
Cast: Josh Lucas, Richard Dreyfuss, Kurt Russell
Certificate: 12

By Roger Crow

Within a few days of buying 1970s disaster classic The Poseidon Adventure, and thinking it was time I revisited the big-budget remake, I’m offered the chance to do just that.

I didn’t remember a lot about the 2006 version, probably because I saw it on a plane. I don’t know if I even watched it all more than a decade ago.

Helmed by Wolfgang Petersen, no stranger to aquatic disasters and CGI waves thanks to The Perfect Storm, this megabucks offering naturally boasts impressive CG effects.

Josh Lucas, flavour of the year back in the day, is the he-man hero on swanky cruise liner Poseidon who begrudgingly agrees to lead a bunch of survivors to safety when. the vessel is in inverted by a massive wave. Richard Dreyfuss is the suicidal Nelson, heartbroken after splitting with his fella. He decides to throw himself overboard, but the sight of a wave big enough to block out the moon gives him a new reason to live.

“Macho heroics”

Once Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas belts out a number which looks dubbed, we’re treated to a few minutes of disaster; some of the survivors assess their predicament and then decide to get out through the upside-down hull. The rest of the movie, like the original, plays out like a computer game as our heroes attempt to get from A to B via some impressive sets. Trivia fans may note there was a SNES game in the 1990s called SOS based on the Paul Gallico source novel. Gallico had been on the Queen Mary and saw an incident which inspired the book.

Kurt Russell is terrific as always as the over protective dad, while Emmy Rossum adds glamour amid the macho heroics. Kevin Dillon is a hoot as the sleazy, booze-swigging Lucky Larry, who inevitably takes an early bath, and Klaus Badelt ensures his score is tense and heroic on all the right places.

Naturally as CG flames were all the rage in 2006, there’s plenty of those, though not CG embers, which became ubiquitous in movies after Avatar three years later.

Unlike the volume of water pressing on the glass in the lower decks, there’s a surprising lack of tension.

Sadly the characters, most of which are far too good looking, default to stereotypes. Only the guys have a plan; the women just react to explosions and get over emotional. And naturally a chunk is shot in the dark, so you have a hard time following what’s going on. Thanks heavens for Spielberg standard high-powered torches to illuminate the gloom.

“Watered down”

The 1970s movie featured some terrific set pieces and well-rounded characters, so there was more investment in their survival. And there were great character actors like Ernest Borgnine and Shelley Winters, but nobody in Poseidon has more depth than a puddle on a rainy day.

Set pieces are well executed, and there’s rarely a chance to get bored, but you’d expect more for a $160million production. I’m guessing Mark Protosevich’s original screenplay was watered down during too many production meetings, and all the good stuff was removed. However, the third act is arguably more satisfying.

Clocking in at 98 minutes, the movie definitely doesn’t outstay its welcome.

Picture and sound quality is great on the new release, and special features include an analysis of the movie by Heath Holland, who provides valuable trivia. It’s not a complete wash out, nor is it a huge success. But if only it had been cut scenes in a video game, I might have enjoyed it more.